Term 'Mud Season' Officially Replaced with 'F@#%ng Construction Season'

Written by Park Inglott Saturday, 08 November 2014

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With a unanimous vote and support from the entire audience, Steamboat Springs City Council officially renamed the offseason months previously known as "Mud Season" as "F@#%ng Construction Season," effective immediately.

Steamboat Springs universally approved the replacement of the term "Mud Season" with a more-accurate description of the offseason months.Steamboat Springs universally approved the replacement of the term "Mud Season" with a more-accurate description of the offseason months.

"Unless you're a hardcore mountain biker, no one in this town has seen any real mud in years, so that term no longer made any sense," said Councilmember Snott Fjord. "But we've all been late for important meetings, become pissed off to no end, and flipped off neighbors in frustration during the months between summer and winter: F@#%ng Construction Season."

According to one anonymous single-mom in the audience, "I understand that we can't do big construction projects during the tourist seasons of summer and winter, but I have to drive my kid back and forth from our home in Whistler Village to school to activities and everything else, while trying to keep my job and not get fired for being late all the time. What can take 10 minutes during a blinding snowstorm now takes 30 minutes in perfect weather. F@#%ng Construction Season."

"F@#%ng Construction Season" officially begins the day after the ski mountain closes and pauses for the summer season between 4th of July and Labor Day, to continue from then until the opening of the ski season. All previous use of the term "Mud Season," whether in official documents or social discourse, now must be removed and replaced with "F@#%ng Construction Season" as long as the abysmal traffic conditions persist.

Any out-of-town visitor from a major city who happens to be here offseason and can't understand why Steamboat residents bitch and complain about a few extra minutes of driving time should be told to "shut up and go back to where they came from."


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